Quickly approaching is our third anniversary. While that is VERY exciting, it also makes me nervous. Scott asked me if we could go to dinner alone. And leave Cohen with grandparents. I don't think he (Cohen) is ready for this. When he gets sleepy/fussy, he wants me ONLY and gets more frantic the longer he isn't with me. I know grandparents are more than capable of caring for him even if he would get like this with them, but how the heck am I going to enjoy dinner with my husband when I'm worried sick about my babe? I know I'm the exception and most moms my age wouldn't think twice about doing this, but I'm different. I enjoy my babe and providing for his needs so much. And, I truly believe that putting in so much effort now will pay off in the long run.
And it's not that I won't ever leave him, but I just feel he's still so young and that somehow would feel betrayed and abandoned if he got hysterical and I wasn't there. I don't know, maybe I'm just crazy.
And I also don't want to neglect my husband either. He needs and wants me too and has in many ways been put more on the backburner lately.
And... I know it's OUR anniversary, but I feel like it is the start of our family that we are celebrating, and Cohen is a part of that.
I just don't know what to do. I suggested maybe I just cook and we could bring Cohen to his parents for a bit for us to eat just the two of us.
Arghh. Why do I feel like such a freak for not wanting to leave my baby for even just an hour??
Boo.
Oh Katie, the first time I EVER left the babies for even a few minutes was on our 6th anniversary. We went to dinner. It was very nice. But, I was worried about the babies at home. Worth it? Yes. They did beautifully (really) and we got 2 hours of "us" time after such a long time of turmoil. We planned it so that we would be gone during their playtime before bedtime so their routine would stay the same. We were back before their typical fussy time - so we did go very early. It's a little trick that still works well today (and I still only leave them for VERY short periods). You're definitely NOT a freak. You're doing just fine!!
ReplyDelete